th@tgirl1971
10-14-2005, 02:00 AM
I am so angry. I just typed a whole long message, and it's gone. Maybe that's a good thing. :) I thought after the S. Peterson case and the Groene case that I would end there, but we know how that goes. 'smiles'.
Anyhow, when I was 16 years-old, my friend introduced me to a guy that I was very intrigued with. He seemed very wise and down to earth. One part of me wanted to be around him every second, the other part told me to 'run while you can'. He was 31 years-old, and he had a daughter just a few years younger than me. My mom called every priest under the sun to try and get through to me, but that only made me rebel further. My dad (although an alcoholic) knew right away what was keeping me attracted to this azz. It was the fact my mom was forbidding it. My dad told her to let me see him as much as I wanted. My mom freaked. My dad did warn me though that in time, I would have no friends, Mark would not allow me to go and do high school things, and I would not be allowed to go to college. My dad knew people very well as he listened more than he talked. Mark vehemently denied my dad's prophecies, and he told me that he only wanted me to get ahead and succeed.
Well by my 17th b-day, Mark was becoming more possessive and fulfilling everything my dad had warned me about. By my senior year, when it came time to take my SAT tests for college, Mark wouldn't allow it. He became verbally and physically abusive.
Finally, at 18 I had enough and broke up with him. The was the best thing I ever did. I'm lucky to still be alive considering some of the things he had done to me.
Before Mark, there was a guy named John that saw me at church and chased me out in the parking lot to ask if I would go out with him. I was flattered. The next week he took me to breakfast and was stunned when he found out I was only 16. (He was 25) After a few dates, he called me and told me that it was wrong. He said he wanted me to enjoy my high school years and have all the fun that I was entitled to. I was so hurt as first, but now that I am an adult, I see what a huge favor that mature man did for me. He did turn out to be my Youth Ministry teacher that Fall. ::o
The one thing I have figured out about Ben Fawley is that he is immature. Whether it be his bipolar disorder or just a failure to grow up, he'd rather hang out with the young ones so they find him interesting and intriguing rather than someone his own age finding him pathetic.
I honestly thought I would never see a man near forty consider himself a 'goth'. I am in no way trying to be an expert on the gothic community, but I honestly thought from what I hear from my kids that it's a stage you go through in high school. Most of the goths do not have the money nor the reputation to be a cheerleader/jock so they could have some kind of label if they just wear second-hand clothes from the thrift store, put on some heavy black eye liner, and dye their hair black. At least it gives you some kind of identity if you don't have a 'cultered' background. I just find it very immature to have a man nearly 40 still considering himself 'goth'. Like I always tell my teens and younger ones (which I know they are sick of hearing)...."You might as well do makes you feel comfortable in this world because no matter who you are or how you look, there are still going to be people that having something to say about you."
As for his photography, I have looked at the pics he took of Taylor. I'm no photographer, but the best pics I have seen (whether by a professional or my homemaker aunt) is the best shots are the candid ones where nobody knows you are snapping the shot in that instance. Ben doesn't have a whole lot of talent as far as I'm concerned.
One more thing I have to get out as far as an observation... Most killers start with pornography. First it's the soft porn, then the hard porn, animals, children, infants, rape, and finally death. I hope to God never to encounter such an addictive person to pornography, but it's like any other disease....it just keeps progressing.
Please remember these are all my opinions. None of these statements are fact, but just little thoughts that pop in my head.
God Bless you, Taylor. You are in a much better, peace-filled, love-abundant place. That's easy for me to say....for if you were my little girl...the best place I could think of you in....is in my arms. :rose
Anyhow, when I was 16 years-old, my friend introduced me to a guy that I was very intrigued with. He seemed very wise and down to earth. One part of me wanted to be around him every second, the other part told me to 'run while you can'. He was 31 years-old, and he had a daughter just a few years younger than me. My mom called every priest under the sun to try and get through to me, but that only made me rebel further. My dad (although an alcoholic) knew right away what was keeping me attracted to this azz. It was the fact my mom was forbidding it. My dad told her to let me see him as much as I wanted. My mom freaked. My dad did warn me though that in time, I would have no friends, Mark would not allow me to go and do high school things, and I would not be allowed to go to college. My dad knew people very well as he listened more than he talked. Mark vehemently denied my dad's prophecies, and he told me that he only wanted me to get ahead and succeed.
Well by my 17th b-day, Mark was becoming more possessive and fulfilling everything my dad had warned me about. By my senior year, when it came time to take my SAT tests for college, Mark wouldn't allow it. He became verbally and physically abusive.
Finally, at 18 I had enough and broke up with him. The was the best thing I ever did. I'm lucky to still be alive considering some of the things he had done to me.
Before Mark, there was a guy named John that saw me at church and chased me out in the parking lot to ask if I would go out with him. I was flattered. The next week he took me to breakfast and was stunned when he found out I was only 16. (He was 25) After a few dates, he called me and told me that it was wrong. He said he wanted me to enjoy my high school years and have all the fun that I was entitled to. I was so hurt as first, but now that I am an adult, I see what a huge favor that mature man did for me. He did turn out to be my Youth Ministry teacher that Fall. ::o
The one thing I have figured out about Ben Fawley is that he is immature. Whether it be his bipolar disorder or just a failure to grow up, he'd rather hang out with the young ones so they find him interesting and intriguing rather than someone his own age finding him pathetic.
I honestly thought I would never see a man near forty consider himself a 'goth'. I am in no way trying to be an expert on the gothic community, but I honestly thought from what I hear from my kids that it's a stage you go through in high school. Most of the goths do not have the money nor the reputation to be a cheerleader/jock so they could have some kind of label if they just wear second-hand clothes from the thrift store, put on some heavy black eye liner, and dye their hair black. At least it gives you some kind of identity if you don't have a 'cultered' background. I just find it very immature to have a man nearly 40 still considering himself 'goth'. Like I always tell my teens and younger ones (which I know they are sick of hearing)...."You might as well do makes you feel comfortable in this world because no matter who you are or how you look, there are still going to be people that having something to say about you."
As for his photography, I have looked at the pics he took of Taylor. I'm no photographer, but the best pics I have seen (whether by a professional or my homemaker aunt) is the best shots are the candid ones where nobody knows you are snapping the shot in that instance. Ben doesn't have a whole lot of talent as far as I'm concerned.
One more thing I have to get out as far as an observation... Most killers start with pornography. First it's the soft porn, then the hard porn, animals, children, infants, rape, and finally death. I hope to God never to encounter such an addictive person to pornography, but it's like any other disease....it just keeps progressing.
Please remember these are all my opinions. None of these statements are fact, but just little thoughts that pop in my head.
God Bless you, Taylor. You are in a much better, peace-filled, love-abundant place. That's easy for me to say....for if you were my little girl...the best place I could think of you in....is in my arms. :rose